Prenatal Pesticide Exposure Linked to Autism Spectrum Disorder

 

One of the biggest threats we face as parents who are trying to raise healthy families is the way we produce the food we eat. 

Findings from a recent British Medical Journal study suggest that “an offspring’s risk of autism spectrum disorder increases following prenatal exposure to ambient pesticides within 2000 m of their mother’s residence during pregnancy, compared with offspring of women from the same agricultural region without such exposure. Infant exposure could further increase risks for autism spectrum disorder with comorbid intellectual disability”.

Source: https://www.bmj.com/content/364/bmj.l962

26: Q&A with Michelle

Michelle sits down solo to answer three listener questions from our Instagram family.

  1. How do I help my children be more grateful and thankful?

  2. How do you respond to your child when they say “that’s not fair”? Do you tell them life isn’t fair or is there a better way you would handle it?

  3. How do you reason with a two year old who is incapable of understanding consequences or the future?

**If you would like to be a guest on our podcast, please email us at team@getparented.com**

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25: How 13 Years of Michelle's Advice Shaped A Family

Michelle sits down with Brooke, a mother of four who has been a student of Michelle’s through classes and private sessions for 13 years.

They walk through Brooke’s journey of discovering that it’s not necessarily your children’s behavior that needs to be modified…it’s most likely yours. Listen in to hear how Michelle’s teachings have led Brooke and her family to a calmer, more peaceful way of life, and be sure to join our community HERE to ask Michelle some questions of your own!

**If you would like to be a guest on our podcast, please email us at team@getparented.com**

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24: Teaching Children The Spirit of Giving

In a world full of “mine, mine, mine” how do we teach our children to think of others?

Michelle sits down with Britt, a mother of 4 and returning guest to discuss the spirit of giving during the holiday season. Britt tells the story of taking her 6 year old son to Target to buy a gift for his cousin. Can you guess what happened? Listen in to find out, and join our community HERE to ask Michelle some questions of your own!

**If you would like to be a guest on our podcast, please email us at team@getparented.com**

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23: 3 Sons In 13 Months with Nicole Pence

Michelle sits down with Nicole Pence to talk about life as a mother of 2 year old twin boys and a 1 year old boy all born within 13 months! Nicole seeks advice on dealing with how physical and aggressive boys can be, and she shares stories of pausing her TV news career, biting toddlers and mommy judgement.

Nicole is an Emmy winning journalist who has connected with thousands of people in-person, on-air, and online for 10+ years. Follow along with Nicole at www.nicolepence.com for creative, entertaining, and informative content about life, motherhood, and raising so many babies at once!

Follow Nicole on Instagram @nicolepence

**If you would like to be a guest on our podcast, please email us at team@getparented.com**

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**To book a 1-1 phone consultation or session with Michelle, please visit www.michellegambs.com for more information**

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22: My Three Boys

Welcome back for Part 2 of Meg’s show. Meg, a boy mom of 3 young boys ages 6, 4 and 2 sits down with Michelle to discuss strategies for a more peaceful home. They discuss handling conflict when other people’s children are involved, how to respond when your children incessantly ask for something, and modeling the behaviors you would like to see. If you missed the first half of Meg’s episode, look for Episode #21: Mom, Mom, Mom, Mom, Mom. Enjoy!

If you have a question you would like answered on our next Q&A episode, please email it to team@getparented.com or send us a message on Instagram @getparented. Thank you for listening.

**If you would like to be a guest on our podcast, please email us at team@getparented.com**

Follow us on Instagram @getparented

**To book a 1-1 phone consultation or session with Michelle, please visit www.michellegambs.com for more information**

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21: Mom, Mom, Mom, Mom, Mom

Michelle welcomes Meg to the show, a boy mom of 3 young boys ages 6, 4 and 2. They discuss handling conflict when other people’s children are involved, how to respond when your children incessantly ask for something, and modeling the behaviors you would like to see. This session with Meg provided so many questions and answers that we split it up into two. Stay tuned for Part 2 next week, and enjoy!

If you have a question you would like answered on our next Q&A episode, please email it to team@getparented.com or send us a message on Instagram @getparented. Thank you for listening.

**If you would like to be a guest on our podcast, please email us at team@getparented.com**

Follow us on Instagram @getparented

**To book a 1-1 phone consultation or session with Michelle, please visit www.michellegambs.com for more information**

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The Roundup - Grit & A Growth Mindset

 

The round-up on grit, self-regulation, and a growth mindset in children

  • To have grit is to have perseverance and passion for long term goals (Angela Duckworth). Duckworth, professor of psychology at The University of Pennsylvania and author of “Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance” has found that talent or IQ alone do not translate to success later in life- Grit is a better predictor of later success than intelligence (IQ) .

  • Grit lives under the overarching umbrella of conscientiousness, one of the big-5 personality traits. “Grit is the combination of perseverance and passion for long-term goals”- Angela Duckworth. She remarks that it's not just working hard, it’s combining that with a passion for something that gives you a sense of purpose.

  • A conscientious person is careful and vigilant, efficient and organized. She typically has a high level of self-discipline and is very goal-oriented.


How do we instill these characteristics in our children?

  • It’s important for us as parents to set realistic and manageable expectations for our children. It is the cornerstone of raising resilient children and ones that have grit.

  • How gritty are you? Take the quiz on Angela’s site here.

  • So...the real question we parents are asking ourselves is...can grit be learned? Can parents instill grit in their children? And the answer is, we think it’s possible.

  • Does teaching kids to be gritty help them get ahead?

  • Practical advice and useful strategies that may help make kids gritty:

    • Choose activities that the child enjoys and has a passion for but that also challenges them. The “hard-thing” rule.

    • Know that there will be frustration, heartache, disappointment and failure along your child’s way. It’s how you react to that, and it’s how you teach them to react to that failure that really matters in the long run.

    • Mindset: Angela Duckworth says the best thing we can do to instill grit on the next generation is to teach a “growth mindset”. https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0345472322/ref=as_li_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=9325&creativeASIN=0345472322&linkCode=as2&tag=persfinaforst-20&linkId=G4GZPWBCHQGT347C

    • A “growth mindset”is the underlying belief of an individual that they can get smarter, accomplish something difficult and understand that effort makes them stronger. An individual with a growth mindset embraces challenges, persists over setbacks, learn from mistakes or failures, and understands that effort is the path to mastery.

    • It’s never too late. New neural connections in the brain can form with practice in growth mindset thinking and a person who has a less than optimal mindset can eventually train their brain to perform differently.

    • Teach your children to have a growth mindset by recognizing effort over success and encouragement over praise. Talk about the importance of “Yet”. “I can’t ride my bike...YET”-Mastering something takes time. Help them set measurable goals and celebrate failures. Start a tradition in your family to talk everyday about one thing each person tried and failed at. What went wrong and what can be done next time to make a better effort? And last, model a growth mindset and positive self-talk.

- Britt Franken 

As a mother of four kids, six chickens and one puppy, Brittany knows a few things about raising little ones. She is determined to raise children with resilience and grit, and believes in a gentle but firm parenting approach. Brittany is our co-founder, writer and researcher, constantly working behind the scenes on helpful articles and resources to share with you.

Praise vs. Encouragement

 

More often than not we as parents confuse encouragement with praise.

Praise is NOT encouragement.

True encouragement stimulates cooperation and contribution for the good of all. It focuses on effort, persistence and determination and has little or no evaluation component. It fosters acceptance of being imperfect, self-sufficiency and interdependence. Children learn how to motivate themselves from within. 


Examples of encouragement:
- I can tell you worked really hard on that painting.
- The laundry got done a lot quicker last night when you helped.
- You seem to really enjoy reading.
- I really enjoyed watching you play in your soccer game. How did you think you played?

- Britt Franken 

As a mother of four kids, six chickens and one puppy, Brittany knows a few things about raising little ones. She is determined to raise children with resilience and grit, and believes in a gentle but firm parenting approach. Brittany is our co-founder, writer and researcher, constantly working behind the scenes on helpful articles and resources to share with you.

The Power of Words

 

In the Solomon Islands in the south Pacific some villagers practice a unique form of logging. If a tree is too large to be felled with an ax, the natives cut it down by yelling at it. Woodsmen with special powers creep up on a tree just at dawn and suddenly scream at it at the top of their lungs. They continue this for thirty days. The tree dies and falls over. The theory is that the hollering kills the spirit of the tree. According to the villagers, it always works.

Ah, those poor naive innocents. Such quaintly charming habits of the jungle. Screaming at trees, indeed. How primitive. Too bad they don’t have the advantages of modern technology and the scientific mind.

Me? I yell at my wife. And yell at the telephone and the lawn mower. And yell at the TV and the newspaper and my children. I’ve been known to shake my fist and yell at the sky at times.
The man next door yells at his car a lot. And this summer I heard him yell at a stepladder for most of an afternoon. We modern, urban, educated folks yell at traffic and umpires and bills and banks and machines–especially machines. Machines and relatives get most of the yelling.

Don’t know what good it does. Machines and things just sit there. Even kicking doesn’t always help. As for people, well, the Solomon Islanders may have a point. Yelling at living things does tend to kill the spirit in them. Sticks and stones may break our bones, but words...they’ll break our hearts….

- Robert Fulgham

What Do You Do When Children Won't Eat Their Dinner?

 

Q: What do you do when your children just won’t eat dinner or the food you prepare?

Let’s begin with you are not a short order cook. Parents provide the food. You can lead a horse to water, but you cannot make them drink. Food and going to the bathroom are ENTIRELY within your child’s power what they are going to do. Let us respect and understand that. It is their body.

With that being said, it is up to us to PROVIDE the food. It is up to them to EAT the food. They may. They may not. It is said that it takes a child seven exposures to a food before they will try it. So? Expose, expose, expose. Keep putting things on their plate that are a stretch for them. Also include those foods that you KNOW that they enjoy. Stop arguing about it.

A fabulous phrase that I encourage all of you to adopt is “at our house”. "At our house, we taste everything on the plate if we would like dessert.“ (“At our house, we go to bed at 8.” “At our house, we have x amount of screen time.”) You get the idea. AT OUR HOUSE… I am willing to put sweet food in a mouth that has also had healthy food. That was our rule. Taste it all (you may spit it out), dessert was available then. (which was a bowl of treats in the pantry they can choose from) If they choose NOT to taste all the items, no problem. Stop arguing.

Natural consequences are the most effective form of learning, when we say nothing to intervene and let the consequence speak for itself. The consequence of not tasting everything? No sweets. No lecture either. Just be still and let it play out. Hard for us parents who talk WAY too much, which is most of us. Children then become parent deaf - hearing everything around them except us!

The consequence of not eating the dinner at all? Hunger. Do not save them from the natural consequence. That moment later of hunger pang is their moment of learning. 

“I’m hungry”

“That makes sense to me. I wonder what you will do tomorrow night at dinner?”

(“At our house” a banana was always available on the counter. That was it.)

Sound harsh? Feel guilty? You have done nothing wrong. You PROVIDED the food. They CHOSE not to eat it. Remember also that there are many nights that they LIKE the food and still choose not to eat it and do not starve. SOMEHOW these kids all still seem to progress on those pediatric growth charts despite their picky food choices! Step back. Provide exposure to foods. Recognize the power is in their hands. You have done a fabulous job of providing food FOR them! You got this!

- Michelle Gambs

Michelle Gambs is a parenting coach and private practice psychotherapist with a masters degree in counseling. She teaches an Indianapolis based 5-week parenting course titled "Redirecting Children's Behavior", and is a wonderful addition to our team as the host of our podcast.

20: How Gentle Parenting Changed My Life

Michelle shares how this style of gentle parenting changed her life, and how it can change yours too. Is it disrespectful for your kids to tell you NO? Find out in this short and sweet episode.

If you have a question you would like answered on our next Q&A episode, please email it to katie@getparented.com or send us a message on Instagram @getparented. Thank you for listening.

**If you would like to be a guest on our podcast, please email us at katie@getparented.com**

Follow us on Instagram @getparented

**To book a 1-1 phone consultation or session with Michelle, please visit www.michellegambs.com for more information**

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19: Talking Mom Guilt & Technology with Emily Schwalbach

Emily and Michelle talk about mom guilt, screen time, birth order, trying new foods and the decision to try for a third child. Emily is a local social media consultant at Be Social Consulting working to balance her growing business, growing family and her own self-care. These years are packed full of many challenging decisions for parents! Listen in to some wonderful advice and perspective from a fellow working mom trying her very best every day to make a positive impact. If you have a question you would like answered on our next Q&A episode, please email it to katie@getparented.com or send us a message on Instagram @getparented. Thank you for listening.

You can find Emily’s social media coaching info HERE

**If you would like to be a guest on our podcast, please email us at katie@getparented.com**

**To book a 1-1 phone consultation or session with Michelle, please visit www.michellegambs.com for more information**

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18: Q & A Teenage Years

Michelle answers YOUR questions today, specifically about teenagers! Episode #5: Teenagers is by far our most popular episode, and moms and dads out there need some help. We touch on staying out past curfew, lying, and the consequences of posting inappropriate things online. Enjoy! If you have a question you would like answered on our next Q&A episode, please email it to katie@getparented.com or send us a message on Instagram @getparented. Thank you for listening.

**If you would like to be a guest on our podcast, please email us at katie@getparented.com**

**To book a 1-1 phone consultation or session with Michelle, please visit www.michellegambs.com for more information**

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17: Meltdowns & Rewards

Michelle talks with Elissa & Doug, two parents raising a 4 year old girl and 2 year old boy. They discuss ways to stop meltdowns before they start, rewards for good behavior and how much of a STUD Doug really is. The story of how they met is so incredible! Enjoy!

**If you would like to be a guest on our podcast, please email us at katie@getparented.com**

**To book a 1-1 phone consultation or session with Michelle, please visit www.michellegambs.com for more information**

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16: Respectful Parenting & Loving Discipline Pt. 2

Part two of Michelle’s conversation with Rachel, owner of a local almond butter company Revival Food Co. Rachel runs her thriving business here in Indianapolis while raising a 2 month old and 2 year old with her husband and one adorable terrier named Jack. They discuss ways to curb fights with children over tv time and simple strategies you can implement to create a more peaceful and stress free home.

www.revivalfoodco.com

**If you would like to be a guest on our podcast, please email us at katie@getparented.com**

**To book a 1-1 phone consultation or session with Michelle, please visit www.michellegambs.com for more information**

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15: Respectful Parenting & Loving Discipline Pt. 1

Today Michelle talks with Rachel, owner of a local almond butter company Revival Food Co. Rachel runs her thriving business here in Indianapolis while raising a 2 month old and 2 year old with her husband and one adorable terrier named Jack. They discuss how Rachel started Revival Food Co., respectful parenting and how to lovingly discipline children. Enjoy!

www.revivalfoodco.com

**If you would like to be a guest on our podcast, please email us at katie@getparented.com**

**To book a 1-1 phone consultation or session with Michelle, please visit www.michellegambs.com for more information**

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Family Photos by Whitney Neal Studios

14: Adding a Sibling to The Family

Are you read to add a new baby to the family? Is one already on the way?! If so, congratulations! Siblings are a wonderful addition to a child's life, and adding to a growing family is such a special time. Listen in as Michelle talks you through preparing your child for the new arrival, how to mitigate tantrums and what to expect when the baby arrives. Enjoy!

**If you would like to be a guest on our podcast, please email us at katie@getparented.com**

**To book a 1-1 phone consultation or session with Michelle, please visit www.michellegambs.com for more information**

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13: Co-parenting Teenagers During a Divorce Pt. 2

Co-parenting Teenagers Through Divorce Pt. 2

Listen in as Michelle and Kelli(who took Michelle's parenting class 13 years ago!) discuss divorce, co-parenting, and supporting your children through a tumultuous time while you’re dealing with everything on your own. 

* Strategies for spiritual healing

* An approach to keeping your children out of the fighting

* Suggestions for supporting your teenager through a traumatic event

* Real-life tales from the road

*Finding peace on your own

 

**If you would like to be a guest on our podcast, please email us at katie@getparented.com**

**To book a 1-1 phone consultation or session with Michelle, please visit www.michellegambs.com for more information**

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12: Co-parenting Teenagers During a Divorce Pt.1

Co-parenting Teenagers Through Divorce

Listen in as Michelle and Kelli(who took Michelle's parenting class 13 years ago!) discuss divorce, co-parenting, and supporting your children through a tumultuous time while you’re dealing with everything on your own. 

* Strategies for spiritual healing

* An approach to keeping your children out of the fighting

* Suggestions for supporting your teenager through a traumatic event

* Real-life tales from the road

*Finding peace on your own

 

**If you would like to be a guest on our podcast, please email us at katie@getparented.com**

**To book a 1-1 phone consultation or session with Michelle, please visit www.michellegambs.com for more information**

www.getparented.com

www.michellegambs.com

Follow us on Instagram @getparented